Spanking lifestyle

The wish to spank yourself is normal!

Some people with unconventional sexual interests are worried, or convinced, that these interests mean they are mentally ill.

I have good news. Even if you think about spanking a lot, even if you are doing a lot of spanking, if it is not disrupting your life or harming anyone else, you don’t have a psychiatric disorder. In fact, the only scientifically reliable study that is relevant to this question suggests that people who love spanking may be a little healthier than average. We have our Australian friends to think for this fascinating research (I give the details in a later section). Their conclusion is supported by what I’ve read on the blog and in the literature, and by the people I know who share this interest.

That’s why I can say with confidence:

People who love spanking are as mentally healthy as everyone else. 

Of course, being interested in spanking doesn’t immunize you against emotional difficulties. If you were abused as a child or suffer from anxiety and depression now, that’s important, and you may be hurting. If you were physically punished in a harmful way when you were younger, you may be trying to come to terms with that now. If so, I encourage you to get professional help. I’ll have a lot to say about what kind of professional is most likely to be able to help you later on. But your interest in spanking isn’t a sickness in itself.

The best proof of this can’t be found in a book. It is in people who integrate spanking into lives that are full and successful in every respect. I know some of these people in person, others through their inspirational blogs (like Bonnie at A Spanko Garden). They are living proof that people who love spanking can lead wonderful lives. If they can do it, you can too.

You may have met people like this, but you wouldn’t know it. They don’t talk about their interest in spanking with people they meet at work or school, that wouldn’t be appropriate. But they are real. And they discreetly visit the secluded meadow.

I can show them to you, tell you what their lives are like. It’s a fascinating story, one I want you to hear.


If you want to integrate accountability in your life, become more goal oriented or just want to spank yourself anyway, you should consider, apart from reading the other articles here, to get the The guide for self spanking. It will teach you the backgrounds of spanking, some things to consider when starting first, and various scenarios in which spanking yourself is necessary. 

Check out the guide here or click on this image, to go directly to Amazon:


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5 thoughts on “The wish to spank yourself is normal!

  1. Hi John

    I am a regular on this blog as of September! and often look for guidance to self – spanking my self for things I find need correcting. I also seek others to spank me as well once a month as I do feel I need that much correction in my life.

    I am very happy and thankful I found this blog! thanks to you and Miss Jessica.

    Your blogs have helped me to feel a lot better about myself! after having been a frustrated Self – Spanker and sub to mistresses for almost two decades! starting to think I was very strange and abnormal. I am now in my mid 30s! I felt like at one stage I was not normal and that the only ones that understood my desire to be spanked on an on going basis was the ladies I would see to punish me.

    Please let me tell you the full story! I was one of those children that was physically punished from the time of early child hood until I left home at 18. My mother was one of those that spanked my bear bottom for every offense from big to small. My mother however was a very loving mother! and I respect her a great deal despite spending a lot of my childhood and teenage years with a red behind.

    Unlike a lot of young people that leave home after years’ of being spanked leaving home would I think be glad to be leaving such a home environment at 18. My last spanking was at the age of 18 and three months by my mother. But I found my self free!! I had finished my schooling and had a good job! doing well in sport! but like all 18 year olds I was still a teenager! and found trouble like we all do at that age.

    I started to miss my mothers’ guidance and felt I needed to compensate for my stuff ups! and naughty teenage behaviour! and felt I needed to take a stance on my life choices and get my self back to being level headed person. I sat down and would write a whole load of rules that I needed to follow! and next to each one I would write the penalty down for each break of the rules! not all of the punishments on the list would result in spanking! but all the same they would be punishments I hated.
    Not of any surprise however after the way my mother had brought me up! most of those rule brakes involved me spanking my self with tools that stung like hell on a bear bottom. I was a self spanker and in charge of my own correction for the next on going few years from 18 to 22! I then went to the next level at 22 and then started seeing mistresses to spank me as I could not find a partner that wanted to take me over her knee! they thought my desire for them to spank me! was very very strange! hence I started to question my self sanity. I continued to see mistresses and self spank myself from 22 to the age I am now in my mid 30s.
    I now have another partner who understands and even watches my self spankings’ and some times when Its something I have done that upsets her! I have even got a mistress a few times to give me a dam good spanking with her watching it. She does however not feel comfortable in spanking me her self yet! maybe that will come one day.

    One thing that I have found is that this blog and feed back from Miss Jessica’s guidance has helped me the last month and a half to realise that I am normal! and not a freak in this judgemental world we live in.

    Please from the two of you keep these great blogs and advice going! you have helped refresh me and I now understand reading through these blogs that I am not alone as far as being a self corrector and Self – Spanker is concerned .




    • Your experiences are so much like some of mine. I was spanked by virtually every type of woman there is growing up – aunts, babysitters, cousins, neighbors, teachers. All had the spank anytime anywhere philosophy of the 50’s and 60’s.

      When my step-mother left, I was 16 and had no one to control or direct me, so I did foolish and what I now know very dangerous things – smoking, driving while drunk, etc. In high school, I would come home on my lunch hour, take all my clothes off, put on my “punishment” panties, and self-spank myself before going back to class – I made myself leave my panties on for the rest of the day, just like my step-mother had made me do after she gave me a bare bottom spanking.

      I also had a job in a barber shop, which was spanking nirvana. Good old fashioned razor strops were in abundance – strapped to each chair and many more in storage. I would come back to the shop on weekends and in the evenings when it was closed and make my way into the storage closet where I would climb up on a chair, pull my pants down, and strap my bare bottom until I couldn’t stand the sting.

      I continued “sneaking” self-spankings into my life for the next 30 years, before I got brave enough, and raised enough money to see a professional mistress, who gently and expertly led me to and beyond my limitations and gave me great insight and understanding into my spanking desires, needs, wants, and deserves.

      Sorry about the long windedness, sometimes I just get carried away when I start writing.


  2. Thank you so much for your kind words.

    I wanted you both to understand my appreciation of this blog! and also wanted to add my own life story on this matter so that you can see my full understanding and background in this world of correction and spanking.

    If my story can help others’ to be proactive! and use correction in their own lives and realise that they are normal in their desire to be spanked! and self – spanked! then that would make me so happy.




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